Will Smith

Why does everybody think Will Smith is so great, lets be honest he’s only ever made three excellent films Bad Boys, Independence Day and Ali, but Ali was made almost ten years ago. How long can he possibly run of the back of The Fresh Prince. Apparently Smith turned down the role of Neo in the Matrix to do Wild Wild West, so at least he only made one shit movie, instead of one good movie and two shit sequels. it’s a shame because he is a good actor, Ali was proof of that, and he seems like a nice guy, he just has poor taste and makes bad choices., but then again how long as an audience can we forgive such over-rated boredom fests like Seven Pounds and In the Pursuit of Happyness, or the popcorn slop of Men in Black and Wild Wild West.


Yo, are you ready for us yet, please for fuck sake pump it up prince.

Toy Story 3

This has to be one of the most depressing animations I’ve ever seen, the most depressing being Grave of the Fireflies, the first proper scene after the fantasy flashback intro, sees the toys conducting a similar ‘mission’ to that featured in the previous instalments, but you soon come to realise that the ’mission’ at hand is an effort to get Andy to play with the toys, who have long since been relegated to a chest in the corner, and a mission which ultimately fails. After this quite sad moment we’re treated to a role call of the toys that didn’t make it, and the jumping ship of the soldiers.

Saying that it also has some of the funniest moments of the trilogy, such as Mr. Potato head needing a body and using a tortilla wrap. As well as containing possibly the greatest prison escape ever seen on film, its like Papillon, Shawshank and the Great Escape rolled into one and injected with play-doh

I think the most beautiful moment, which genuinely brought a tear to my eye, is towards the end, after the escape from the day-care centre, and they’ve have ended up at the dump. The toys are heading into the incinerator with no foreseeable chance of escape, Buzz reaches out and grabs Jesse’s hand to comfort her, and with that the rest of the toys follow suite and link hands to face the impending death together.

So in summary this is one of the saddest, funniest, most beautiful, prison escape, coming of age films ever made… about toys.

The Lovely Bones

I really loved this film, and reckon its probably Peter Jackson’s best work since The Frighteners, ‘cause lets face it Lord of the Rings was good, but Return of the King didn’t know when it wanted to end, so did so about 12 times, and King Kong was a fat monkey turd.

Mark Wahlberg and Rachel Weisz are both excellent as the grieving parents, but are not a patch on Stanley Tucci (The Terminal, The Devil wears Prada) who is both creepy and menacing as the child killer, and Susan Sarandon is brilliantly funny as the alcoholic grandmother . But I think where the film excels is in the limbo scenes which are stunning.

It does lose marks though for the end, which isn’t quite as satisfying as you would like, but given that its an adaptation there isn’t a lot Jackson could do about that without pulling a De Vinci Code and rewriting the whole ending , and lets face it that was the main, but not the only, reason it was shit.

Where the Wild Things Are

“CAROL, THAT WAS MY FAVORITE ARM”


When I think back to my childhood there are two books I think of: The Hungry Caterpillar and Where the Wild Things Are, so when I found out Wild Things was being made in to a film, by Spike Jonze no less, I was quite excited by the prospect.

Spike Jonze, legendary music video director and brain behind the cinematic mind twist that is Being John Malkovich, brings us a stunning adaptation of a childhood classic, accompanied with an excellent original soundtrack penned by Karen O, of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

And I’m pleased to say he pulled it off, because lets face it, it could well have been a disaster. Its one of those films that’s so entertaining and original, that I could have happily watched it again straight away., and that I was genuinely thinking about days later.